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MARY E THOMPSON

it's a curvy road to happily ever after

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Forgotten

Forgiving Ourselves

December 14, 2018 by Mary

Do you ever screw up? Do something that you regret later? Maybe someone gets hurt or you just feel stupid for your choices. I’ve done it, so many times, and letting go and forgiving myself is never easy. 

I’ve been talking about overcoming doubt and being thankful. I feel like all these topics go together because they remind us that what we want isn’t always easy, or good for us. 

I started this series talking about my weight and how I wish I could lose weight. When a friend of mine was diagnosed with cancer and died seventeen months later, I made the decision to get healthier for my kids. I did it, too. I dropped 3-4 sizes, I felt so much better, and I lost 40 pounds. Then I was diagnosed with cancer, moved 800 miles, and had my life turned upside down. In six months, I gained back almost all the weight I’d lost, beat cancer, and felt both better and worse. Since the cancer I had was centered around my airways, I could breathe much better, but the weight I gained offset some of that benefit. Now, three years later, I’m still at that increased weight. And I effing hate it. 

But I have to remind myself that I’m here. I have another chance to fight and get better. I went to the oncologist last week and my scans are still clean, three years post treatment. I can fight my weight instead of my cancer. I can lose that weight again, and I’m thankful for that opportunity. 

It still makes me mad that I let myself gain the weight back. Everyone around me blames the steroids I was on and the poor eating habits I picked up during chemo, when I could only stomach grilled cheese for three days and increased my calorie intake to keep my stomach settled. It doesn’t matter why I gained weight again, I need to find a way to get rid of it. For good this time. 

The hardest part of all of it for me is letting go of what I should have done. As a writer, I write about everything. I write my frustrations, what I wish I’d done differently, how I feel. Some people talk it out, with a friend or alone. Maybe you should visualize it, or act it out, or make models like Steve Carell’s character in Welcome to Marwen. Nothing is off limits when it comes to forgiveness — for yourself and others. 

How do you move on and forgive yourself?

When you doubt yourself, who do you trust? 

Forgotten (F-BOMB series)

Life was hard enough. Normal was a fallacy. There were bad guys everywhere. But he couldn’t sit back and let her deal with it. He had to face his demons to fight hers. He had to give everything he had to her to keep her safe. His heart wasn’t a part of the bargain, but he handed it over anyway. 

Available now!

Ebook on Amazon | Kobo | Apple Books | B&N | Google Play| Smashwords

Filed Under: F-Bomb, Relationships Tagged With: Blessings, Body Positive, Forgive, Forgotten, Thankful

Being thankful for what we have

November 30, 2018 by Mary

Last week was thanksgiving in the US. It’s a time of year when everyone is celebrating all the things they’re thankful for. Their blessings, their treasures, the people in their lives that make it better. Why do we wait until one day, or one month, to talk about these things?

I wrote last time about moments of doubt and how they challenge us and try to convince us to stay put when we want to move. I feel being thankful for what we have does the opposite. Being thankful gives us hope. It shows us a better way. It tells us it’s worth it. We need that all the time!

I don’t always appreciate the things I have. I bitch about my home and argue with my kids. I complain about my car and my health and my weight. I wish I could blink and change so many things in my life. But if I take a step back and actually look at my life, I have it pretty damn good.

I have a home. It might not be my perfect dream home, but I’m warm in the 30 degree weather, safe, and can provide for my family.

I have a family. I’m not alone like so many people are. I have a husband who loves me, two amazing kids, parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, cousins, nieces, and a nephew, and so many more.

I have friends. My two closest friends don’t live near me, but I have friends. Amazing friends.

I’m healthy. Yes, that’s always up for debate, but I go to the gym, I have plenty to eat, and with any luck, next Friday I’ll find out I’m still in remission.

I have a job I love. So many people can’t say that, but I can. I love it. Yes, it has its challenges, but I love it.

How many people around the world can count all these things? How many people are content? Yes, there are things I want to change, and I added qualifiers to every single thing I’m thankful for, but I’m still thankful for them. My life could be a lot worse. It has been. When I was single and never thought I’d find love. When I was trying to get pregnant and never thought I’d have kids. When I was going through chemo and never thought I’d see my kids grow up. When I was in a job that was killing me and never thought I’d get out. When I moved to a new city and never thought I’d make friends.

Life is hard. No one is going to tell you it’s easy. And if they do, chances are they’re holding back. Because nothing is easy, but it’s so damn worth it. And all your blessings prove that to you every day.

Never give up on your dreams. Be thankful for how far you’ve come, and keep pushing toward that next dream.

What are you thankful for?

 

When you doubt yourself, who do you trust? 

She was alone. She liked it that way, because it meant she wouldn’t get hurt again. But he pushed past her walls and changed everything. He made her see herself the way he saw her. And she knew she’d never love again like she loved him. 

Available now!

Ebook on Amazon | Kobo | Apple Books | B&N | Google Play | Smashwords

Filed Under: F-Bomb, Relationships Tagged With: Blessings, Forgotten, Thankful

Some things are better left forgotten

November 27, 2018 by Mary

We all have things we’d like forgotten. Memories that aren’t that good. Regrets. Stupid things we’ve said or done. Sometimes we get lucky and they’re forgotten by everyone around us, even if they feel like they’ll never go away for us.

Jaymes still remembers the moments he was taken with clarity. But lucky for him, being forgotten isn’t all bad.

Excerpt from Forgotten

Kelsea stuck a bite of pasta in her mouth and laughed. She and Jaymes spent the day together, in and out of bed. It had been a long time since she let herself be that free with a man, but it felt natural with Jaymes. He made her feel beautiful, so walking around naked wasn’t an issue for her. 

“I wish I’d known you when you were younger,” she told Jaymes. 

He shook his head. “Oh, no. That wouldn’t have been good. I never would have gotten my degrees if I had a woman like you around when I was younger. I spent most of my sex life alone. That worked well for me.” 

“Yeah, right. A guy like you can’t possibly go unnoticed. The glasses give you a sexy, nerdy vibe. And these muscles. You’re seriously hot, Jaymes.” 

He went silent on her for a minute. When he met her gaze, there was something unreadable in his. “I started working out after I was taken. And the glasses are new, too. I was kept in a basement. It was so dark and I stared at a computer screen for so long that it strained my eyes and I need glasses now.” 

Well, shit. “I’ll just chew on my foot in silence for now.” 

He shook his head and gave her a tight grin. “You didn’t know.” 

She shrugged. “No, but I should have. You said something before, and I just forgot. Is that bad? That I forgot you were taken.” 

He shook his head. “It’s not. It’s good. It means you see more of me than the victim I am.”

Buy it today!

Ebook on Amazon | Kobo | iBooks | B&N | Google Play | Smashwords

Filed Under: F-Bomb, Teaser Tuesday Tagged With: Forgotten, New Release, Sneak Peek

Forgotten is HERE!!!

November 13, 2018 by Mary

I was so excited when Forgotten was the book chosen as the second story in the F-BOMB series. I loved Jaymes, and he really earned his happily ever after. Kelsea was a fun character to get to know. She’s smart and passionate and wounded. She’s also scared, and needs someone to validate her fears. But she’s tough. Tougher than even she realized.

These two work well together. They’re hot and cold and frustrating and heart-warming. They made me want to shake them at times, but in the end, they made me so happy. I hope you love them as much as I do!

Excerpt from Forgotten

Kelsea stared up at him. She’d never been all that shy with the men she dated, but she rarely made the first move. As she stood there, looking up at him, she remembered why. 

It sucked getting shot down. 

The longer he looked at her, the more she realized the emotions and desire swirling around the room were all coming from her. He didn’t want her. He wanted to keep her safe, but that had nothing to do with wanting her. 

She felt so stupid. 

She ducked her head and swallowed the hurt. She went to step back, but he grabbed her arms. Lightly, but enough to get her to look up at him again. 

“Don’t.” 

“Don’t what?” 

“Don’t walk away. Let me see you. All of you, Kelsea. Just let me look at you for a minute.”

Available Now!

Ebook on Amazon | Kobo | iBooks | B&N

Filed Under: F-Bomb, Teaser Tuesday Tagged With: Forgotten, Release Day

Moments of Doubt

November 9, 2018 by Mary

I’d like to think we all have moments of doubt. Those times in our lives when we’re really not sure things are going to work out. Days when what you want seems so out of reach that you wonder how you’ll ever get there. Maybe you will, and maybe you won’t, but how do you know when to give up and when to fight with everything you have?

I’ve had a lifelong struggle with losing weight. I know a lot of people who’ve had the same, so chances are you understand this, even if it’s from watching a friend or relative. When I was young, I knew I was bigger than the other girls, but I didn’t realize what this meant until later. I got my period before all my friends, I had boobs before all of them, and I got hit on by older men before all of them. None of those were good things in my young world.

I was a soccer player all through high school, so I was active. I was also the slowest one on the team. And when soccer season was over, I hung up my cleats and picked up a book. I look back now and wonder why I thought I was fat, but in the moment you don’t have that perspective. You compare yourself to everyone around you and most of us find ourselves wanting.

I’m staring down 40 now. Everyone who’s crossed that threshold has told me losing weight is so much harder after hitting that magic number. As of today, I have less than 18 months before I get there. I also have about 100 pounds I’d like to lose in order to be considered healthy for my height.

Here’s the rub… I lost half that. I was 50+ pounds lighter just three years ago. Then cancer happened and steroids and chemo and poor eating habits because when you feel like shit, you eat whatever sounds good, even if it’s grilled cheese for three days straight. I gained back all that weight I lost, and losing it all again is really damn hard.

So I doubt. I wonder if I’ll ever do it. I lost the weight the first time over three years. I don’t have three years until that magic number. Will I be able to lose weight after I turn 40? Will I gain it back if I do lose it? Will I ever make it to the weight I want to be, the weight that means my knees won’t ache when I climb stairs in the winter and my feet won’t protest when I’m on them too long?

I don’t know. I won’t know until I lose the weight and find out. I felt better 50 pounds ago, so even though I have my doubts, I’m ready. I’m ready to tell my doubts to shut the hell up and let me live. I’m going to fight – myself, my crappy eating habits, that Reese’s cup on my desk that’s been staring at me for days. I refuse to give up, because I’m here. I know it isn’t going to be easy, but let’s be honest: nothing is easy. Some things are easier than others, but nothing is easy. I’m ready to tell my doubts to go away and let me have my faith. That’s what I need right now.

Faith.

How do you overcome moments of doubt?

 

When you doubt yourself, who do you trust? 

Why would anyone follow her? She wasn’t the kind of woman who inspired 1000 ships. Hell, she got dumped for being fat. There was no way she actually had a stalker. But he believed her. He never once questioned her. And that was scarier than a stalker. 

Available November 13

Ebook on Amazon | Kobo | iBooks | B&N

Filed Under: Body Positive, F-Bomb Tagged With: Doubt, Forgotten, Overweight, Trust

She’ll never be Forgotten

October 30, 2018 by Mary

He’s doubted himself since he was taken. She’s doubted herself since her ex dumped her for someone thinner. Neither has the confidence to open up, but both find a way.

Excerpt from Forgotten

Kelsea closed her eyes for a second, then took a step toward him. Her gaze met his, and the realization of what she meant finally sunk in. 

His pulse kicked up and his heart pounded. His cock rose as his gaze dipped down to appreciate the curves he was finally allowed to look at. 

When she was close enough that he had to meet her gaze, she stared up at him with vulnerability and desire painted all over her face. She thought he was going to turn her down. The knowledge nearly knocked him on his ass. How could any man say no to her? She was beautiful, sexy, and every fantasy he’d ever had come to life. Any man who resisted her was a saint. Or a fool. 

Jaymes was a lot of things, but he wasn’t either of those.

Available November 13

Preorder today!

Ebook on Amazon | Kobo | iBooks | B&N

Filed Under: F-Bomb, Teaser Tuesday Tagged With: Coming Soon, Forgotten, Teaser

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Enjoying my Sunday today and looking for the brigh Enjoying my Sunday today and looking for the bright, happy, good in life. #authorlife #authorsofig #buffalony #happysunday
He was the one that got away. Ran away really. But He was the one that got away. Ran away really. But he came back. Almost twenty years later. With a teenager. Wanting another chance. 

➤https://geni.us/h5qj

#contemporaryromance #bookboyfriendswanted #steamyromance #smalltownromance #bookgasm  #readromance #authorsofig #indieauthor #newrelease
Ten people were taken from my city over the weeken Ten people were taken from my city over the weekend. Ten people who did nothing wrong. The person who took their lives was filled was hate and took it out on innocent people. #BuffaloNY is the City of Good Neighbors. I didn't know those ten people, but I feel their loss like the rest of my city does. We are all neighbors, and we all hurting. 

My thoughts and prayers are with the families and friends of Aaron Salter, Ruth Whitfield, Pearl Young, Celestine Chaney, Roberta Drury, Heyward Patterson, Margus Morrison, Andre Mackneil, Geraldine Talley, and Katherine Massey; and with the survivors: Zaire Goodman, Jennifer Warrington, and Christopher Braden.
Dating your ex in a small town means everyone know Dating your ex in a small town means everyone knowing your business. Like the fact that he broke your heart. They should all be on my side, right? Too bad he’s bringing an old town hangout back to life. And getting everyone involved. And making all of us fall in love with him. 

READ NOW ➤ https://geni.us/h5qj

#contemporaryromance #bookboyfriendswanted #steamyromance #smalltownromance #bookgasm #bookporn #readromance #authorsofig #indieauthor #newrelease
All those books make me so happy. I could curl up All those books make me so happy. I could curl up and read all day in there! #readhere #authorlife #readromance #amreading #authorsofig #bookedweekend
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