Football

Faking It

August 30, 2018 by Mary

Football is a complicated sport. Sure, we want to believe the men who play are just lumps of muscle without much in their heads, but they have to remember complicated plays and move at lightning speed in order to do well. That’s even harder at every level they move up in the game. The men who play professional football are the best of the best. They’re smart and fast and talented.

They’ve also studied the game for years.

You’re not going to know everything about the game of football in a few posts from me. Hell, I don’t know everything. Not by a long shot. But I know enough to get by, and can fake it the rest of the way. I’ve been watching football for more than three decades. Consistently. I’ve never played, but I’ve watched hours and hours of games, in person and on TV. I can impress men who think they know more than every woman they’ve ever met, and I regularly do.

So can you.

How? Follow three quick and easy tips.

Watch the ball.

The majority of flags will be thrown because of something that happens around the ball. If you keep your eyes on the ball, you’ll see if the receiver steps out of bounds. You’ll see if he gets one or two feet in after he catches the ball. You’ll see if it gets tipped and thrown off its course. You’ll see a lot. So will everyone else, but you won’t be standing there asking what happened (most of the time) if you keep your eye on the ball.
Watch the quarterback. Or the kicker.

The quarterback is arguably the most important person on the field at any given time. When he’s not on the field, during a kick-off, punt, or field goal attempt, the kicker is the most important person. Why do I say that? Because that’s the person in charge of the play. If the quarterback throws the ball, then gets hit, there could be a flag (the defense can take no more than two steps to allow for momentum – if they don’t stop, they get a penalty). Any time the kicker is hit (unless someone gets blocked into him), a flag comes out. These are considered defenseless players. They shouldn’t be hit at that point. So watch them.
The quarterback will control the game. You’ll see a sack coming that he doesn’t. You’ll see where he’s going to throw the ball before he lets go. You’ll see a perfectly timed leap by the defense to block that pass. You’ll see a lot if you keep your eyes on the quarterback.
The kicker is the same. When he’s getting ready to kick the ball, you’ll see him focused and ready. You’ll see him focused, even with someone charging him. Players can try to block a kick, but they’re not allowed to hit the punter or kicker. It’s ugly when that happens. Picture it. The punter has the ball, punts it away, his leg is up and he’s balanced on one foot. And a huge man comes in and tackles him. That could end a career. So he’s protected. Now, if the snap sucks and he has to chase the ball and becomes another player on the field, that’s different. He can be tackled, but if he’s kicking, he’s somewhat safe. (It is football!)
Watch the line of scrimmage.

A lot happens at the line of scrimmage. It’s where the ball is set at the beginning of each play. If someone jumps before the snap, you’ll see it watching the line. After the snap, the quarterback has to know where the line is so he doesn’t step over it and throw the ball. If he does, it’s a forward pass, which isn’t allowed in front of the line of scrimmage. It’ll also tell you if the offense moved the ball or got taken down for a loss. The men on the sidelines with the orange markers will show what down it is and you can judge how far the ball needs to go. On TV, they use colored lines to show you all this. You know it’s important if they developed technology to make sense of it!

It was quick, and it was dirty, but I hope you learned something through this short series of posts. I love football. It’s my favorite sport to watch, so much that I barely care who’s playing when I watch a game. It’s a fun game, and if you’re in the US, it’s everywhere! Bring on football season!

Where do you keep your eyes during a play?

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She doesn’t have time for a cocky football player or a relationship. She doesn’t really want him either. At least, that’s what she tells herself. Then he makes her laugh, and makes her feel beautiful, and she’s not sure what she wants anymore.

Follow the Rules!

August 27, 2018 by Mary

One of my big pet peeves is when things aren’t fair and equal. Yeah, I know, that’s life, but that doesn’t mean it’s okay.

When you’re playing a game like football, with rules that are supposed to keep things balanced between the two teams on the field, you need to make sure everything is equal. Both teams, no matter their inherent skill, should have an equal shot at winning. Yes, one team is always going to be better, but the refs shouldn’t make that difference even broader.

There are more rules than I can go over right now, but I want to touch on a few that are common and important. Are you ready?

Ready? Set. Go!

The quarterback decides when the ball should be snapped. The has a signal for the rest of the team. The first person to move is the center, the guy who has his hand on the ball. Until the center moves, no one else is allowed to move, once everyone is set.

If the offense jumps before the center snaps the ball, it’s called a false start. If the defense jumps, it’s offsides. Either way, the play is reset in a new spot – usually either five yards forward or back depending on who jumped. There are times when the penalty is more severe – like when someone comes across the line and tackles the quarterback – but typically, you’ll see either a false start or offsides.

Stay out of the way!

Pass interference is another common one. Basically, neither team can prevent the other from catching the ball by getting in the way of a player. You can smack the ball away, catch the ball instead of the player it was intended for, or get a hand in so he can’t catch it, but if you shove the guy out of the way, they’re going to throw a flag. That’s on offense or defense. If the ball is coming to you and you shove the defender away so you can catch the ball, you’re going to get a flag. It works both ways, but pass interference is more commonly called on the defense.

Catch the ball!

Have you ever wondered how everyone around you knows if the catch on the sidelines was good or not? Usually it’s the receiver’s feet. In professional football, two feet need to touch the field in bounds. In college and lower levels, only one has to touch. A foot is considered pretty much any part – a toe, the entire foot, even a knee. Once a player’s knee touches the ground, he’s considered down (mostly), but a knee and a toe will count in professional football as a completed pass.

The other part of that is the receiver has to have control before he gets that foot or two in bounds. That means the ball can’t be moving. If he’s bobbling the ball, he needs a step or two (depending on the level) after he has complete control of the ball. If he’s diving for it, he has to land and keep control of the ball. There are some exceptions to this, when the rule on the field is that the ground knocked the ball out and otherwise he would have maintained control. For the most part though, as long as he gets his feet down, he’s good.

There’s always more!

Yeah, there are more rules. Lots more really. But if you can understand those couple rules, you’ll get most of the game. Next time we’ll talk a little bit about how to fake the rest of it so you can follow along with the game and know what’s going on.

What other rules do you not understand?

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He needs to do something to help repair his image. She’s not what his agent had in mind. But he has trouble resisting the curvy mom of one of his players.

Are you ready for football season?

August 24, 2018 by Mary

I am!

I love football season. Growing up, I played soccer, which is a fall sport where I live, but I’ve always loved watching football. Because I grew up in a football town, I thought everyone, men and women alike, understood at least the basics of the sport until I went to college.

I was watching a football game with a friend one weekend and after the team scored a touchdown, they lined up for the point after touchdown (PAT). My friend asked if it was like extra credit. Being the smartass I am, I told her there was a judge in a booth up top and if the team scored a cool touchdown, they were given the chance to score one more point, but if it was over the top awesome, they could try for two points. She was impressed. I was rolling on the floor.

Yes, I told her the truth, but what it taught me was that not everyone understands football like I do. I learned that lesson again when I met my husband and realized that although he watched the sport and liked it, he didn’t understand it as well as I did. (He told me he never watched as much football before he met me.)

Now I’m teaching my kids all about the sport I love, and we’re going to games and cheering and having a great time. If you’re a football fan, but not all that up on the sport, I’m sharing a few things with you over the next few days so you can fake your way through football season and convince your friends and family you know what you’re talking about!

It’s Good!

I’m guessing it’s obvious that there are two teams, both trying to score. There are a few different ways to score in a football game. The most recognizable is a touchdown, which is worth six points (the PAT adds one or the two-point conversation adds two). The second way is a field goal, worth three points, and a safety worth two points.

Touchdown

A team scores a touchdown when a player with the ball is in the opposing team’s end zone. He could catch the ball or run into the end zone with the ball, but he has to make it into the end zone. We’ll talk rules next time, but just know that if the ball doesn’t make it into the end zone, there’s no score.

After a touchdown, teams get to choose if they want to kick the PAT or try for a two point conversation (at some levels they can’t go for two). A kick is the common pick because it’s almost guaranteed, but a team will try for two in strategic situations toward the end of a game.

Field Goal

The second most common way to score is a field goal. This is when the kicker lines up and tries to kick the ball through the goalposts. They are allowed to kick from anywhere on the field, but a good coach will know the kicker’s range and will usually not choose to attempt a field goal if it would be farther than the kicker can make it. If the kick is not good, the ball is turned over to the other team at the line of scrimmage where the kick was attempted, but if the kick is successful, the team gets to kick off again, so there’s incentive to make sure an attempt is going to be good!

Safety

An uncommon way to score, but one that you’ll see if you watch enough football, is a safety. A safety happens when a player is tackled in his own end zone, or when the ball leaves the end zone out of bounds. What I mean by that is Team A punts the ball and it ends up on Team B’s 2 yard line. Team B’s quarterback gets the ball snapped to him, he steps back, and gets sacked in the end zone. Team A just scored a safety.

If Team B’s center made a bad snap and the ball goes over the quarterback’s head and out of bounds, that’s still a safety. Sometimes players will intentionally kick a ball out of bounds in the end zone to give the other team a safety because it prevents a touchdown (which would happen if Team A grabbed a loose ball in the end zone).

There are a couple other ways to score a safety, but they’re so rare, I doubt you’ll ever see them. If you’re really curious, you can read about them here.

Are you ready now?

Football can be a really confusing game, but knowing how the points are awarded is a big step toward understanding the game itself. Next time we’ll talk a little about the rules of the game.

Did you learn anything new?

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She’s a single mom with too much to do to worry about men. He’s her son’s new football coach, and too much at stake to stay. Neither wants to get involved, but both know it’s inevitable.